I get a lot of questions via email each week from men interested in the cuckold lifestyle, and really want to introduce the hotwife concept to their wives, but are not sure how to bring up the topic. It takes a lot of guts and confidence to approach your wife with the idea that you want to see her with other men–and it’s downright courageous to tell her that you might like to feel humiliated in such an encounter as well.
So what is the best way to bring up this topic? Hopefully, you and your wife are strong enough in your relationship that you have an atmosphere of openness and honesty, and you’re both able to communicate your sexual wants and needs. Still, this is a pretty daunting topic, and even the most open and honest couples might find talking about cuckolding and hotwives to be challenging.
How do you make the critical first step? It’s a tough situation. You have to express your desire, without scaring her away and closing the door on the fantasy all together.
Let me suggest an icebreaker that might help get the conversation started in a nonthreatening way. Mention to your wife that you had a dream where you were watching her having sex with another man. Be sure to remind her how sexy and sensuous she was in the dream, how much she appeared to be enjoying herself, and how much you enjoyed watching her. Be descriptive, but remember that dreams are very ephemeral and memories of them fade. You can’t be too detailed.
Take as long as needed to let the concept simmer. Don’t just come right out and say, “And I’d think we should try it.” Give her some time to get her head around it. Ask her if she’s ever had similar dreams or thoughts? Now is the time to mention that you would like to see her in such an encounter–but it is not the time to ask her to begin planning one. You should take care to keep it conversational and exploratory. Don’t try to force the issue. More than anything you need to gauge her interest and begin to plant the seeds to keep the conversation going.
Certainly, this approach could be used for any number of fantasies, not just cuckolding, hotwives and threesomes. This might be how you bring up your interest in exploring swinging. Or anal. Or anything. It’s a low-impact way for you to let her try on different ideas for size, based on something you dreamt–at no fault of your own.
Placing the blame for the fantasy squarely on the shoulders of a dream, gives you an out. After all, it was only a dream, right? If she goes nuts, hey, blame it on the dream: “I don’t know why I dreamed it–I just did.” But it does give you an easy conversation starter and an easy way to see how open she might be to discussing it further.
Who knows? She might tell you about a dream she had too!
David :: Mar.01.2007 ::
Advice, Cuckolds, Hot Wives ::
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